Some Days This isn't Easy

There are days where I quite honestly don't want to keep fighting my illness. I want to take out my feeding tube and let whatever happens happen because I am just so tired of fighting. Tired of my life revolving around feed and medicine schedules, doctors appointments, and hospital stays. Tired of being strong and not letting on that all of this does actually gets to me, and that I do worry about what is going to happen to me in the future. But I can't stay down for too long or it sucks the life out of me. I have to find the strength from someplace deep with in me and continue to fight this big scary thing that currently doesn't have a name.